Sarah shared this with me yesterday morning. I hadn't heard about it on the big announcement and I immediately needed to leave for work, so I didn't have much time to process at all. When I got home last night at 8:00 the "breaking news" was over and our rabbit ear reception did not get any coverage from the news. I had a difficult time resting without processing what had happened; I had been processing it internally but needed an opportunity to process externally as well.
In the "olden days" when people talked to each other in the town square (or around the camp-fire, or in the church social hall) the opportunity to externally process was natural and regular. Cultures create ways to connect with others that reflect the trends of the day. Some say that this is why our generation has a more difficult time processing traumatic events...we don't have T-I-M-E or social permission to share outloud, or simply listen to others share outloud.
By default I went to the street corner of our age: Facebook. I wanted to share and be shared with; this is a venue that many of my circle are actively a part of and I wanted to be "with" them. I think that is O.K.
The internet was running slow and I found the outprocessing/inprocessing I needed with my lovely wife. I just like the sound of her voice!
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Sunday, April 10, 2011
A lifestyle of frenetic energy...
Sarah and I were looking through some old photo albums from the summer we met in North Myrtle Beach the other night. In the midst of photos that reflected the mosaic of that summer's life together I caught myself saying things like:
"I was really excited to get a job at the Surf Club because I was able to make more money per hour and they let us work a half-day on Saturday to get a few more hours in."
"Sunday was the day for church, beach outreach, and small group leader's training. Monday was a night for dinner. Tuesday was discipleship night. Wednesday was mid-week worship. Thursday was large group. Friday was time for going out on the town. Saturday was work in the morning, beach outreach in the afternoon, and large group socials at night."
"I think I should have gotten a job that paid less and required fewer hours so that I could have enjoyed my time with others more."
The thoughts that came from these pictures showed me something bigger than the individual events I was looking at. What I noticed was a summer that reflected the bigger picture of my life as an adult.
I spent the next afternoon on the hammock in our back yard watching the kids jump on the trampoline. I called a handyman to fix the bathroom toilet, let the weeds in the mulch grow a little longer, and fell asleep. When Sarah eventually woke me up I committed to spending another year learning how to live a lifestyle of rest.
"I was really excited to get a job at the Surf Club because I was able to make more money per hour and they let us work a half-day on Saturday to get a few more hours in."
"Sunday was the day for church, beach outreach, and small group leader's training. Monday was a night for dinner. Tuesday was discipleship night. Wednesday was mid-week worship. Thursday was large group. Friday was time for going out on the town. Saturday was work in the morning, beach outreach in the afternoon, and large group socials at night."
"I think I should have gotten a job that paid less and required fewer hours so that I could have enjoyed my time with others more."
The thoughts that came from these pictures showed me something bigger than the individual events I was looking at. What I noticed was a summer that reflected the bigger picture of my life as an adult.
- In High School I worked part-time jobs and did a ton of extra curricular activities, feeling over-loaded and telling myself it would change when I graduated.
- In college I took 18-20 credits a semester, practiced 2-3 hours a day, and was involved with a ton of extra curricular activities, feeling over-loaded and telling myself it would change when I graduated.
- When I graduated I worked a ton of hours with little downtime, moved around the country exploring life in the USA, and was involved with a ton of extra activities that kept me feeling over-loaded and telling myself this would change when I "settled down" with a family.
- When I got married I worked a ton of hours with little downtime, always had at least two jobs, and was involved with a ton of extra activities that kept me feeling over-loaded and telling myself that things would change when I..."got promoted in the Army," "Quit the army," "Got a higher paying job," "Potty Trained all of the kids,"...
I spent the next afternoon on the hammock in our back yard watching the kids jump on the trampoline. I called a handyman to fix the bathroom toilet, let the weeds in the mulch grow a little longer, and fell asleep. When Sarah eventually woke me up I committed to spending another year learning how to live a lifestyle of rest.
Thursday, February 24, 2011
From Winston Churchill...
I'm reading The Second World War by Winston Churchill and found his views on rest very interesting. Just after the war began and he was given the lead role in the British Navy he decided to take a nap everyday as soon after lunch as possible. Here's his explanation:
...I had recourse to a method of life which had been forced upon me at the Admiralty in 1914 and 1915, and which I found greatly extended my daily capacity for work. I always went to bed at least for one hour as early as possible in the afternoon, and exploited to the full my happy gift of falling almost immediately into deep sleep. By this means I was able to press a day and a half's work into one. Nature had not intended mankind to work from eight in the morning until midnight without that refreshment of blessed oblivion which, even if it only lasts twenty minutes, is sufficient to renew all of the vital forces. I regretted having to send myself to bed like a child every afternoon, but I was rewarded by being able to work through the night until two or even later-sometimes much later-in the morning, and begin the new day between eight and nine o'clock. This routine I observed throughout the war, and I commend it to others if and when they find it necessary for a long spell to get the last scrap out of human structure.
Pretty well written! Couldn't have said it better myself.
...I had recourse to a method of life which had been forced upon me at the Admiralty in 1914 and 1915, and which I found greatly extended my daily capacity for work. I always went to bed at least for one hour as early as possible in the afternoon, and exploited to the full my happy gift of falling almost immediately into deep sleep. By this means I was able to press a day and a half's work into one. Nature had not intended mankind to work from eight in the morning until midnight without that refreshment of blessed oblivion which, even if it only lasts twenty minutes, is sufficient to renew all of the vital forces. I regretted having to send myself to bed like a child every afternoon, but I was rewarded by being able to work through the night until two or even later-sometimes much later-in the morning, and begin the new day between eight and nine o'clock. This routine I observed throughout the war, and I commend it to others if and when they find it necessary for a long spell to get the last scrap out of human structure.
Pretty well written! Couldn't have said it better myself.
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Daddy's day off...
Yesterday I took a sick day because of a procedure Sarah was having in the dentist office that was going to take her out of action for a while (its odd taking a sick day when I am not sick).
First was the normal routine getting Annabel to school. Then scrambled to help Abe get his homework done at the last minute (a regular routine in our home). After dropping Sarah off at the dentist office and Abe off at his school I had a great date with Abigail at Red Robin! Then it was back to pick-up Sarah. After getting her home and in "nap mode" Oak and I went back to pick-up Annabel from school, after which we went to look at dogs at the SPCA (only for fun) and to Sam's club. By then the big brother was done with school so we picked him up, went to the doctor's office to pick-up a prescription, and headed home. Sarah and Abigail were just waking up and I got started on dinner. After dinner was more homework, PJ's, bedtime stories and clean-up.
I loved being with the kids all day, but by 9:30 I was comatose in bed...wiped out! Good work leads to good rest.
First was the normal routine getting Annabel to school. Then scrambled to help Abe get his homework done at the last minute (a regular routine in our home). After dropping Sarah off at the dentist office and Abe off at his school I had a great date with Abigail at Red Robin! Then it was back to pick-up Sarah. After getting her home and in "nap mode" Oak and I went back to pick-up Annabel from school, after which we went to look at dogs at the SPCA (only for fun) and to Sam's club. By then the big brother was done with school so we picked him up, went to the doctor's office to pick-up a prescription, and headed home. Sarah and Abigail were just waking up and I got started on dinner. After dinner was more homework, PJ's, bedtime stories and clean-up.
I loved being with the kids all day, but by 9:30 I was comatose in bed...wiped out! Good work leads to good rest.
Monday, January 31, 2011
Its good to be the king...
In one of Mel Brooks' films a arrogant and out of touch French King is famous for audaciously stating, "Ah, its good to be king!" The audacity is evident because in saying this he is showing everyone around that he is a big jerk with no idea how to truly lead anything, let alone a country. I think the film is The History of the World, but I'm not sure.
When times are tough and I feel like I'd like a dose of "control everything" I need to remember that I am not, essentially, able to force things to go my way. Other people, over whom I have no control, were involved with creating my challenges and other people, over whom I have no control, will be involved with fixing them (if they can be fixed, that is).
Recognizing that I am not sovereign is a step towards finding rest. If I have to be the solution to every problem, or the hero of every story, I will strive, connive, control and usurp all day long to "make it happen." Last I checked, striving, conniving, controlling and usurping are not the traits of a restful person.
The person who can find rest is the one who can rest in spite of the poor circumstances and "out-of-controlledness."
When times are tough and I feel like I'd like a dose of "control everything" I need to remember that I am not, essentially, able to force things to go my way. Other people, over whom I have no control, were involved with creating my challenges and other people, over whom I have no control, will be involved with fixing them (if they can be fixed, that is).
Recognizing that I am not sovereign is a step towards finding rest. If I have to be the solution to every problem, or the hero of every story, I will strive, connive, control and usurp all day long to "make it happen." Last I checked, striving, conniving, controlling and usurping are not the traits of a restful person.
The person who can find rest is the one who can rest in spite of the poor circumstances and "out-of-controlledness."
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Bright Lights, Big City...
I've lived in the country and I've lived in the city. I've lived in some of the smallest, most remote towns in the United States and I've lived in some of the largest, most important cities.
I remember riding with my parents through the desert at night. We'd be able to see the lights from the upcoming towns looming on the horizon and, no matter how tiny the place really was, the lights made it look grand and promising! In the desert you can see the towns coming from miles and miles away.
I remember riding with my parents up I-10 from San Diego to visit my uncle in LA. On those nights we would drive for 3 straight hours at 65 mph and never have a moment when there were not vast numbers of streetlights or house lights surrounding the road in every direction. The population was dense and the lights made me feel like I was a part of something big! In the sprawling cities lights are everywhere.
Now I'm sitting in my living room with a fire in the fireplace and the oil lamps burning. My wife is asleep next to me on the couch, the children are out-cold, and the dog is settling in. Its bitter cold outside and I am thankful not to be on the road going anywhere tonight!
I remember riding with my parents through the desert at night. We'd be able to see the lights from the upcoming towns looming on the horizon and, no matter how tiny the place really was, the lights made it look grand and promising! In the desert you can see the towns coming from miles and miles away.
I remember riding with my parents up I-10 from San Diego to visit my uncle in LA. On those nights we would drive for 3 straight hours at 65 mph and never have a moment when there were not vast numbers of streetlights or house lights surrounding the road in every direction. The population was dense and the lights made me feel like I was a part of something big! In the sprawling cities lights are everywhere.
Now I'm sitting in my living room with a fire in the fireplace and the oil lamps burning. My wife is asleep next to me on the couch, the children are out-cold, and the dog is settling in. Its bitter cold outside and I am thankful not to be on the road going anywhere tonight!
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Put it into practice...
Over the past year I've reflected on how "rest" is as much a frame of mind as it is a physical activity. I've learned that the mind, body, soul and spirit must work together to find quietness and stillness. Little things like a regular bedtime, good/clean/clear friendships, stories & music, and working hard at a job I love, am good at, and find purpose in are all vital to make it through the "long haul" in peace. I've also learned that sacrificing many things that I like, even some that I really-really like, is necessary at times. Now it is time to put these things into practice in 2011!
Three years ago I "resoluted" to get to know myself better and find comfort in my own skin. Two years ago my resolution was to live a life of joy. Following those two up with a life of rest was the perfect order for me.
This year my goal is to adopt a more giving spirit...a crazy, "you should know better than to give that away" spirit. A "damn Doug, we can't afford to give that away" spirit. A "we really need to make a big sacrifice in our comfort level because its time to give deeply" spirit.
At dinner the other night I WAY overtipped because my beautiful bride reminded me of the vow I've made...it was awesome and freeing. I've heard it said that we can't outgive God...this year I'm going to try!
May God bless you all...and please don't use my vow as an opportunity to "gold dig"!
Three years ago I "resoluted" to get to know myself better and find comfort in my own skin. Two years ago my resolution was to live a life of joy. Following those two up with a life of rest was the perfect order for me.
This year my goal is to adopt a more giving spirit...a crazy, "you should know better than to give that away" spirit. A "damn Doug, we can't afford to give that away" spirit. A "we really need to make a big sacrifice in our comfort level because its time to give deeply" spirit.
At dinner the other night I WAY overtipped because my beautiful bride reminded me of the vow I've made...it was awesome and freeing. I've heard it said that we can't outgive God...this year I'm going to try!
May God bless you all...and please don't use my vow as an opportunity to "gold dig"!
Friday, December 31, 2010
Oh no, the year is over!
Getting more rest was my New Year's Resolution for 2010 and today the year is over! Now I'm afraid that I'll suddenly become a neurotic work-a-holic with dark bags under my eyes...I pressed on to keep my resolution for an entire year and now its back to the old habits!
Just kidding.
Learning to live restfully is more of a "New Decade Resolution" than a New Year's Resolution. Maybe in 10 years I'll be ready to move forward, but not quite yet. Its like learning a foreign language...the first 12 years are the hardest!
One take away I've seen is that in order to rest more I have to make sacrifices. At the beginning of this year I was trying to cram too much in; I had to learn to say "no" to many things. This has been one of the most difficult things to deal with!
Second, I see that without God it would be impossible for me to truly find rest. There are so many things outside of my control that at any moment could come crashing in! Knowing God loves me and, even in the worst of these things, will never leave me creates in me a deep peace. The Psalms call it resting under the shadow of his wing...like a baby bird with its mother.
Finally, I've become convinced that getting adequate rest does not come naturally to me. I fight it like a little child before bedtime! I want to work...I hate being bored...there is so much to do that is good, fun, and necessary! I've seen that for my work to be effective, and for any good, fun or necessary things to take place with joyfulness of spirit, I must be well rested.
I'm not sure what 2011's resolutions will be...I have some ideas about ethics, budgeting, giving and music, but nothing has formed in my mind as worthy and/or doable for the year yet. I'll keep you posted!
Just kidding.
Learning to live restfully is more of a "New Decade Resolution" than a New Year's Resolution. Maybe in 10 years I'll be ready to move forward, but not quite yet. Its like learning a foreign language...the first 12 years are the hardest!
One take away I've seen is that in order to rest more I have to make sacrifices. At the beginning of this year I was trying to cram too much in; I had to learn to say "no" to many things. This has been one of the most difficult things to deal with!
Second, I see that without God it would be impossible for me to truly find rest. There are so many things outside of my control that at any moment could come crashing in! Knowing God loves me and, even in the worst of these things, will never leave me creates in me a deep peace. The Psalms call it resting under the shadow of his wing...like a baby bird with its mother.
Finally, I've become convinced that getting adequate rest does not come naturally to me. I fight it like a little child before bedtime! I want to work...I hate being bored...there is so much to do that is good, fun, and necessary! I've seen that for my work to be effective, and for any good, fun or necessary things to take place with joyfulness of spirit, I must be well rested.
I'm not sure what 2011's resolutions will be...I have some ideas about ethics, budgeting, giving and music, but nothing has formed in my mind as worthy and/or doable for the year yet. I'll keep you posted!
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Stories & Boredom...
One of my favorite songs growing up was "The Gambler" by Kenny Rogers. It starts like this:
"On warm summer's evening on a train bound for nowhere I met up with the Gambler...we were both too tired to speak. So we took turns at staring out the window at the darkness until the boredom overtook us and we began to speak."
I love that line...the entire thing grabs me and makes me want to hear the rest of the story! This leads me to my next thoughts on "rest."
First, stories are a great way to "escape" for a while. I just finished the last Harry Potter book...it was a 6 month, 3000 page visit into the world of muggles, horcrux's, flying cars and friendships. The books, while I read them, ruined my sleep patterns for weeks on end; but the story was gripping and I found myself feeling well rested for reading them.
Similarly, what is it we do before bedtime with children all around the world? We read them a story! And, if you think about it, they go to bed and have dreams that are...stories (of a sort). I'm going to embrace stories as a means to rest better.
Second, boredom is something that can completely "overtake" us. Boredom is painful for those not used to it...after basic training I had nightmares about standing in line for hours on end that were so severe I would wake up shaking in the middle of the night! I think that the fear of boredom keeps me from settling down into a lifestyle of rest. To avoid being bored I create unnecessary stress that complicates my life and exasperates my relationships.
Being bored is not a bad thing. I'm certain that Magellan and his crew were bored at some point while circling the globe in a sailboat; Isaac Newton was very likely bored for hours on end while putting together his theory of the Laws of Motion...he was sitting under an apple tree doing what? Resting.
I hope this blog entry has not bored you. I tried to make it interesting by adding a story or two! May you have a boring, story-filled day!
"On warm summer's evening on a train bound for nowhere I met up with the Gambler...we were both too tired to speak. So we took turns at staring out the window at the darkness until the boredom overtook us and we began to speak."
I love that line...the entire thing grabs me and makes me want to hear the rest of the story! This leads me to my next thoughts on "rest."
First, stories are a great way to "escape" for a while. I just finished the last Harry Potter book...it was a 6 month, 3000 page visit into the world of muggles, horcrux's, flying cars and friendships. The books, while I read them, ruined my sleep patterns for weeks on end; but the story was gripping and I found myself feeling well rested for reading them.
Similarly, what is it we do before bedtime with children all around the world? We read them a story! And, if you think about it, they go to bed and have dreams that are...stories (of a sort). I'm going to embrace stories as a means to rest better.
Second, boredom is something that can completely "overtake" us. Boredom is painful for those not used to it...after basic training I had nightmares about standing in line for hours on end that were so severe I would wake up shaking in the middle of the night! I think that the fear of boredom keeps me from settling down into a lifestyle of rest. To avoid being bored I create unnecessary stress that complicates my life and exasperates my relationships.
Being bored is not a bad thing. I'm certain that Magellan and his crew were bored at some point while circling the globe in a sailboat; Isaac Newton was very likely bored for hours on end while putting together his theory of the Laws of Motion...he was sitting under an apple tree doing what? Resting.
I hope this blog entry has not bored you. I tried to make it interesting by adding a story or two! May you have a boring, story-filled day!
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Jacuzzi and a fire...
I have never posted twice in one day, but today is a special occasion. I experienced two awesomely restful things: a Jacuzzi and a fire in the fireplace. No, not at the same time unfortunately.
After my workout at the gym I spent 15 minutes soaking in the hot-tub alone...my mind wandered to blissful places as the muscles in my back, shoulders, and neck were pummeled by jets of steamy water.
The gas-logs were lit today for the first time this winter. Gas logs require so little effort, and the fire is always perfect and warm. Thank God for gas logs!
I'm going to pass-out in front of the fire...its wonderful!
After my workout at the gym I spent 15 minutes soaking in the hot-tub alone...my mind wandered to blissful places as the muscles in my back, shoulders, and neck were pummeled by jets of steamy water.
The gas-logs were lit today for the first time this winter. Gas logs require so little effort, and the fire is always perfect and warm. Thank God for gas logs!
I'm going to pass-out in front of the fire...its wonderful!
Crash and Burn
What happens when an airplane runs out of fuel in mid-air?
Crash and Burn.
What happens when a hot-air balloon runs out of hot air while floating above a city?
Crash and Burn.
What happens when a 37 year old father of 4 pushes it to the limits right before the holidays?
Crash and Burn.
And that is exactly what happened to me this past Friday on Christmas Eve.
We were in Cincinnati after a whirlwind month of parties, family gatherings, shopping, gift-wrapping, traveling, and sight-seeing. Additionally, work in a school is especially intense just before the holidays-just ask anyone who has ever worked with sugar-filled, Santa craving kids in December! On the way to the mall to get photos of the kids with their cousins I leaned over to Sarah, who was driving, and told her to pull over right away...
The kids got a kick out of watching me claim the corner of the road near the CVS with what used to be the contents of my stomach. But for me I was getting kicked in a slightly different way. I was wiped-out!
Two Christmases ago I crashed and burned on Christmas Day. We were home in Charlottesville and I spent all day in bed with a massive headache and fever.
I remember that the Christmas of 2005 was pretty rough. That was the Christmas during grad school when I was taking a full-load of classes, involved with an urban ministry, working 5 jobs, and trying to help Sarah with the soon to be 3 children (she was 7 months pregnant with Oak).
In my mind I have a Norman Rockwell like picture of what the Christmas/New Year's Holiday should be like, but I have not seen that picture come to life in reality yet. My 21st century picture is less austere...its more intense and energized (which I think is how I like it)! I just need to remember that sleep is important and there is an end to how much intensity my body can handle.
Crash and Burn.
What happens when a hot-air balloon runs out of hot air while floating above a city?
Crash and Burn.
What happens when a 37 year old father of 4 pushes it to the limits right before the holidays?
Crash and Burn.
And that is exactly what happened to me this past Friday on Christmas Eve.
We were in Cincinnati after a whirlwind month of parties, family gatherings, shopping, gift-wrapping, traveling, and sight-seeing. Additionally, work in a school is especially intense just before the holidays-just ask anyone who has ever worked with sugar-filled, Santa craving kids in December! On the way to the mall to get photos of the kids with their cousins I leaned over to Sarah, who was driving, and told her to pull over right away...
The kids got a kick out of watching me claim the corner of the road near the CVS with what used to be the contents of my stomach. But for me I was getting kicked in a slightly different way. I was wiped-out!
Two Christmases ago I crashed and burned on Christmas Day. We were home in Charlottesville and I spent all day in bed with a massive headache and fever.
I remember that the Christmas of 2005 was pretty rough. That was the Christmas during grad school when I was taking a full-load of classes, involved with an urban ministry, working 5 jobs, and trying to help Sarah with the soon to be 3 children (she was 7 months pregnant with Oak).
In my mind I have a Norman Rockwell like picture of what the Christmas/New Year's Holiday should be like, but I have not seen that picture come to life in reality yet. My 21st century picture is less austere...its more intense and energized (which I think is how I like it)! I just need to remember that sleep is important and there is an end to how much intensity my body can handle.
Friday, December 17, 2010
So...my last entry was on ethics and how living according to ones ethics leads to peaceful rest. Well, there is a big "BUT" needed to go along with that. That is, "But everyone fails at living up to their ethics."
Therefore, all of us have been offended/hurt by somebody who has not lived up to their part of the bargain. Everyday at work I hear this excuse: "So and So teased me, so I teased them back." or "So and So hit me, so I hit them back...I have to 'defend' myself." The way I see it, there are no humans who live up to their ethical code 100% of the time.
This becomes complicated, because how offended we are by somebody treating us badly is directly proportional to how "good" of a person we think they are. For instance, when a "shitbag" treats us poorly, we are not offended because that person always treats everyone poorly; when a "righteous" person messes up we are deeply offended because we expect them to do a better job of treating us right. We are surprised when "good" people behave badly. A Pastor sinning is more offensive than a ne0-nazi sinning.
Now, what do we do when the scoundrel, the person who "should know better than that," also goes by the same name as I do and looks just like me; what do I do when I am the dick?
This comes down to two ethical stands that don't usually make the top 10:
All of us who have messed up need forgiven...there is the forgiveness.
Holding a grudge creates what eventually becomes the opposite of rest. If I have a grudge I cannot rest well, and the deeper the grudge the less rest I get!
So we need to find humility, recognizing that the person who offended us is in need of the same forgiveness that we need from somebody else we have offended. Its like the opposite of paying it forward (the idea that we return good deeds to somebody other than the person that did the deed for us)...we forgive the person who has offended us because we need forgiven by the person we have offended.
Therefore, all of us have been offended/hurt by somebody who has not lived up to their part of the bargain. Everyday at work I hear this excuse: "So and So teased me, so I teased them back." or "So and So hit me, so I hit them back...I have to 'defend' myself." The way I see it, there are no humans who live up to their ethical code 100% of the time.
This becomes complicated, because how offended we are by somebody treating us badly is directly proportional to how "good" of a person we think they are. For instance, when a "shitbag" treats us poorly, we are not offended because that person always treats everyone poorly; when a "righteous" person messes up we are deeply offended because we expect them to do a better job of treating us right. We are surprised when "good" people behave badly. A Pastor sinning is more offensive than a ne0-nazi sinning.
Now, what do we do when the scoundrel, the person who "should know better than that," also goes by the same name as I do and looks just like me; what do I do when I am the dick?
This comes down to two ethical stands that don't usually make the top 10:
- Humility
- Forgiveness
All of us who have messed up need forgiven...there is the forgiveness.
Holding a grudge creates what eventually becomes the opposite of rest. If I have a grudge I cannot rest well, and the deeper the grudge the less rest I get!
So we need to find humility, recognizing that the person who offended us is in need of the same forgiveness that we need from somebody else we have offended. Its like the opposite of paying it forward (the idea that we return good deeds to somebody other than the person that did the deed for us)...we forgive the person who has offended us because we need forgiven by the person we have offended.
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
The ethics of rest...
A close friend once reminded me that the best pillow is a clear conscience. If our lives are tree houses, we should build them in the center of the of the strongest tree of ethics we can find. No matter what ones occupation is, which country they come from, or how dysfunctional their family is, living in line with ones ethics allows for better rest. No matter how big ones mansion or yaught is, a life of unethical living will result in poor rest, not to mention poor relationships with those around you.
Here is a list of what are commonly considered the core ethics of life (in no particular order):
• Honesty
• Courage
• Gratitude
• Kindness
• Meekness
• Prudence
• Diligence
• Industry
• Cleverness
• Utility
• Balance
Furthermore, almost every profession has a list of ethical standards by which it governs itself against the influx of poor character. Doctors, Real Estate Agents...even Lawyers have ethical standards they try to live by. While living according to a set code of ethics presents challenges, these challenges are no greater than the challenges created by living a hedonistic life void of any moral restraints.
Here is a list of what are commonly considered the core ethics of life (in no particular order):
• Honesty
• Courage
• Gratitude
• Kindness
• Meekness
• Prudence
• Diligence
• Industry
• Cleverness
• Utility
• Balance
Furthermore, almost every profession has a list of ethical standards by which it governs itself against the influx of poor character. Doctors, Real Estate Agents...even Lawyers have ethical standards they try to live by. While living according to a set code of ethics presents challenges, these challenges are no greater than the challenges created by living a hedonistic life void of any moral restraints.
Monday, December 13, 2010
Deep breath...
"Take a deep breath and let it out."
"Do it again, only deeper."
"This time really fill your lungs and release the air slowly and easily."
This is the conversation, very one-sided, I had with my trumpet teacher during my junior year at JMU in the midst of the only anxiety attack I've ever had. Even though I don't remember the details of the circumstances that caused me to feel the need to hide under the couch at that particular moment, I do remember vividly the manner in which he walked me out of it.
I knocked on his door, lost in anxious thoughts. I explained to him how I felt.
Mr. Kluesner told me to get out my breathing tube while he turned on his metronome.
I took some breaths through the tube first, then through my trumpet. I buzzed on my mouthpiece a simple pattern, then added the entire horn. It was a nice, full, easy and rich long tone exercise I had played thousands of times.
The anxious feelings had passed. They were replaced with calm.
"Do it again, only deeper."
"This time really fill your lungs and release the air slowly and easily."
This is the conversation, very one-sided, I had with my trumpet teacher during my junior year at JMU in the midst of the only anxiety attack I've ever had. Even though I don't remember the details of the circumstances that caused me to feel the need to hide under the couch at that particular moment, I do remember vividly the manner in which he walked me out of it.
I knocked on his door, lost in anxious thoughts. I explained to him how I felt.
Mr. Kluesner told me to get out my breathing tube while he turned on his metronome.
I took some breaths through the tube first, then through my trumpet. I buzzed on my mouthpiece a simple pattern, then added the entire horn. It was a nice, full, easy and rich long tone exercise I had played thousands of times.
The anxious feelings had passed. They were replaced with calm.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Essence...
Yesterday I found out some very troubling news...I found out that at lest 3 people, and maybe as many as 6, read what I write here! This is troubling because it leads to all kinds of temptations and questions:
The point of keeping this "blog" is just to provide a short on-line journal to track a New Year's Resolution to get more rest. The potential of other people reading what I write here goes along with why I put these thoughts online rather than in a private notebook. Just like preparing for a trumpet recital in college, the excitement and fear an audience brings has the ability to hone my skills and polarize my thinking. In the same way, an audience can become destructive...it can explode my head with ego or send me crashing off of the front of the stage in shame (nothing kills an ego like embarrassing oneself in public).
Even worse than pride or public humiliation, the red carpets and flashbulbs can rob one of the essence of who they are and what makes them "tick." In short, the answers to the questions I labeled above should not shift too much with 6 readers or 6000...the essence of these thoughts, and my desire to share them, is close to the same now as it was with nobody reading it. If having 10 readers (oh, just imagine!) changes my essence then those readers will lose interest because they are reading this because of the original inspiration they found in the essence of the blog itself. So pride has the ability to destroy what caused it to be sparked in the first place!
Miles Davis use to offend people who paid to hear him because he did not worry about his audience at all, only his art. Wynton Marsailis said once that if you play for applause that's all you'll get. Leonard Berstein is known to have said that if "you are only a musician you are only half a musician." These great and successful performing artist knew their essence and put it out there in front of other people.
- What will they think if I don't write something each day? Do I need to keep a regular writing schedule?
- What is it they would want to read? Should I adjust my topics or style to meet their reading desires?
- What if they really like what they read? Should I get an agent and publish this as a book that becomes a movie? What will it be like to be rich and famous?
The point of keeping this "blog" is just to provide a short on-line journal to track a New Year's Resolution to get more rest. The potential of other people reading what I write here goes along with why I put these thoughts online rather than in a private notebook. Just like preparing for a trumpet recital in college, the excitement and fear an audience brings has the ability to hone my skills and polarize my thinking. In the same way, an audience can become destructive...it can explode my head with ego or send me crashing off of the front of the stage in shame (nothing kills an ego like embarrassing oneself in public).
Even worse than pride or public humiliation, the red carpets and flashbulbs can rob one of the essence of who they are and what makes them "tick." In short, the answers to the questions I labeled above should not shift too much with 6 readers or 6000...the essence of these thoughts, and my desire to share them, is close to the same now as it was with nobody reading it. If having 10 readers (oh, just imagine!) changes my essence then those readers will lose interest because they are reading this because of the original inspiration they found in the essence of the blog itself. So pride has the ability to destroy what caused it to be sparked in the first place!
Miles Davis use to offend people who paid to hear him because he did not worry about his audience at all, only his art. Wynton Marsailis said once that if you play for applause that's all you'll get. Leonard Berstein is known to have said that if "you are only a musician you are only half a musician." These great and successful performing artist knew their essence and put it out there in front of other people.
Monday, November 29, 2010
Teamwork...
Rush Limbaugh's list of 35 undeniable truths begins with this: "There is a distinct singular American culture - rugged individualism and self-reliance - which made America great." Rugged individualism works some of the time...we all have to own our work and live strongly what we are called to, but the old saying, "Many hands make light work." holds true as well. In order for me to live a more restful life, which is not a the same as a lazy life, I must be part of a team of people, both at home and at work, who share the load. Isolation is a ticket for exhaustion and depression! I saw the value of like-minded, thoughtful help very clearly over this past Thanksgiving weekend.
On our lot there are about 10 huge oak trees loaded with beautiful leaves. In the fall all of these leaves come tumbling down and our house is covered with leave a foot deep that need raked, bagged, and carried to the curb. In the back yard it is more difficult because the bags need carried over the top of a pretty steep hill. This year we had quite a bit of help! Sarah's dad was helped us in the morning and our friends the Crichlow's came over later in the day to finish the job. With all of us working we were able to clear the entire back yard of leaves in just over 8 hours...a 3 day job for me reduced to 1 because of the help of friends!
In addition to our own children, we hosted 7 friends/family members, 3 of whom stayed overnight. Other families host more, for sure, but to us this was a real test of our teamwork...in the last week we cooked a ton, did a bunch of dishes, cleaned/re-cleaned the kitchen/bathroom multiple times, set/cleared the kitchen table over and over again, did a little bit of shopping, and put up the Christmas decorations. We were even able to get to the gym and go on a date because other people chipped in to help! Sarah and I worked together to share the load and, at the end of the holiday weekend, we are tired but content...at least I am!
The church we are members of has a more formal manner of worship than our kids generally can manage themselves through. The 90 minute service includes all family members over the age of 5 and, after a couple years of really struggling, we decided about 5 months ago to take a a break from attending worship there. This past Saturday night a family we hosted for Thanksgiving called us and invited us to sit with them at church druing the service, offering to help manage the kids so that we could worship as a family in our home-church. At first my thoughts of public humiliation caused me to gulp pretty hard, but we decided to take them up on it and made out way out the door for worship the next morning. The children did well at first, but after about 15 minutes Annabel was getting antsy. Just as she was beginning to unwind and become disruptive another family swooped in a bit late with their 7 year old daughter in tow. They offered to have Annabel sit with them, giving her the extra steam she needed to push on through the entire service. It was the best behaved my children have been at church ever, and it has to do with the help we recieved from others.
On our lot there are about 10 huge oak trees loaded with beautiful leaves. In the fall all of these leaves come tumbling down and our house is covered with leave a foot deep that need raked, bagged, and carried to the curb. In the back yard it is more difficult because the bags need carried over the top of a pretty steep hill. This year we had quite a bit of help! Sarah's dad was helped us in the morning and our friends the Crichlow's came over later in the day to finish the job. With all of us working we were able to clear the entire back yard of leaves in just over 8 hours...a 3 day job for me reduced to 1 because of the help of friends!
In addition to our own children, we hosted 7 friends/family members, 3 of whom stayed overnight. Other families host more, for sure, but to us this was a real test of our teamwork...in the last week we cooked a ton, did a bunch of dishes, cleaned/re-cleaned the kitchen/bathroom multiple times, set/cleared the kitchen table over and over again, did a little bit of shopping, and put up the Christmas decorations. We were even able to get to the gym and go on a date because other people chipped in to help! Sarah and I worked together to share the load and, at the end of the holiday weekend, we are tired but content...at least I am!
The church we are members of has a more formal manner of worship than our kids generally can manage themselves through. The 90 minute service includes all family members over the age of 5 and, after a couple years of really struggling, we decided about 5 months ago to take a a break from attending worship there. This past Saturday night a family we hosted for Thanksgiving called us and invited us to sit with them at church druing the service, offering to help manage the kids so that we could worship as a family in our home-church. At first my thoughts of public humiliation caused me to gulp pretty hard, but we decided to take them up on it and made out way out the door for worship the next morning. The children did well at first, but after about 15 minutes Annabel was getting antsy. Just as she was beginning to unwind and become disruptive another family swooped in a bit late with their 7 year old daughter in tow. They offered to have Annabel sit with them, giving her the extra steam she needed to push on through the entire service. It was the best behaved my children have been at church ever, and it has to do with the help we recieved from others.
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Thankfulness...
One of the things I love about Thanksgiving is that we all take a time-out from the craziness of life to take stock of the true blessings in life. There is always something to be thankful for! Thankfulness is a virtue that transcends cultures, religions, demographics and geography.
Imagine the following dialogue:
Friend - "So Doug, what are you doing for Thanksgiving this year?"
Me - "Actually, I don't believe in Thanksgiving. Where I come from we aren't thankful.
or...
Friend - "So Doug, do you do anything special for Thanksgiving?"
Me - "My religion doesn't allow me to take time-out to count my blessings."
or...
Friend - "So Doug, do you have big plans for the Thanksgiving weekend?"
Me - "No. In this economy there is nothing to be thankful for so I'm skipping Thanksgiving this year."
Almost everyone I know is in the following situation:
1. There are 3 things they don't have that they really, really want.
2. There are 3 things they do have that they really, really don't want.
At some points there may be 4 things I want and only 2 things I don't want; at other times there may only be 2 things I want and 6 things I don't want. The numbers fluctuate, but there are always a few things that could make my life better.
Before I continue too far, I should remind myself that not all of my desires are bad. For instance, my desire to have Thanksgiving with my mother is not wrong. It is not wrong for me to want my the War on Terror to end peacefully. There are a number of instances in which my life would truly be enriched by the addition or subtraction of specific items. The ethics of desire are very interesting!
Of course, many (many, many, many) of the items on my wish (or "wish not") list are vain phantoms making empty promises to my heart. Pursuing them is like pursuing a mirage. Sometimes it can be worse...sometimes getting the desires of my heart is like getting to the mirage and finding that what you were looking at on the horizon was not water but a large pool of poisonous snakes! Sometimes what we want (or don't want) is the opposite of what actually will bring us joy, peace, and contentment.
In first establishing Thanksgiving as a holiday in the United States, George Washington says (in part):
Now, therefore, I do recommend and assign Thursday, the 26th day of November next, to be devoted by the people of these States to the service of that great and glorious Being who is the beneficent author of all the good that was, that is, or that will be...
At the end of 1863, the year of Antietam, Gettysburg and Vicksburg, Abraham Lincoln wrote:
The year that is drawing towards its close, has been filled with the blessings of fruitful fields and healthful skies. To these bounties, which are so constantly enjoyed that we are prone to forget the source from which they come, others have been added, which are of so extraordinary a nature, that they cannot fail to penetrate and soften even the heart which is habitually insensible to the ever watchful providence of Almighty God.
Thankfulness is not seasonal or circumstantial. I think it is good to pause and take stock of our blessings and give thanks.
Imagine the following dialogue:
Friend - "So Doug, what are you doing for Thanksgiving this year?"
Me - "Actually, I don't believe in Thanksgiving. Where I come from we aren't thankful.
or...
Friend - "So Doug, do you do anything special for Thanksgiving?"
Me - "My religion doesn't allow me to take time-out to count my blessings."
or...
Friend - "So Doug, do you have big plans for the Thanksgiving weekend?"
Me - "No. In this economy there is nothing to be thankful for so I'm skipping Thanksgiving this year."
Almost everyone I know is in the following situation:
1. There are 3 things they don't have that they really, really want.
2. There are 3 things they do have that they really, really don't want.
At some points there may be 4 things I want and only 2 things I don't want; at other times there may only be 2 things I want and 6 things I don't want. The numbers fluctuate, but there are always a few things that could make my life better.
Before I continue too far, I should remind myself that not all of my desires are bad. For instance, my desire to have Thanksgiving with my mother is not wrong. It is not wrong for me to want my the War on Terror to end peacefully. There are a number of instances in which my life would truly be enriched by the addition or subtraction of specific items. The ethics of desire are very interesting!
Of course, many (many, many, many) of the items on my wish (or "wish not") list are vain phantoms making empty promises to my heart. Pursuing them is like pursuing a mirage. Sometimes it can be worse...sometimes getting the desires of my heart is like getting to the mirage and finding that what you were looking at on the horizon was not water but a large pool of poisonous snakes! Sometimes what we want (or don't want) is the opposite of what actually will bring us joy, peace, and contentment.
In first establishing Thanksgiving as a holiday in the United States, George Washington says (in part):
Now, therefore, I do recommend and assign Thursday, the 26th day of November next, to be devoted by the people of these States to the service of that great and glorious Being who is the beneficent author of all the good that was, that is, or that will be...
At the end of 1863, the year of Antietam, Gettysburg and Vicksburg, Abraham Lincoln wrote:
The year that is drawing towards its close, has been filled with the blessings of fruitful fields and healthful skies. To these bounties, which are so constantly enjoyed that we are prone to forget the source from which they come, others have been added, which are of so extraordinary a nature, that they cannot fail to penetrate and soften even the heart which is habitually insensible to the ever watchful providence of Almighty God.
Thankfulness is not seasonal or circumstantial. I think it is good to pause and take stock of our blessings and give thanks.
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Naptime...
Yesterday I was able to grab a 30 minute nap after work and before my evening began. When I woke up I was very, very groggy for about 5 minutes, but after that I felt totally refreshed! My patience with the kids and evening chores, along with my attitude about working late at school, were totally better than normal.
Getting a nap in my family is a team effort. To make it happen I needed help from Sarah (who kept the kids out of the house at the park), my boss (who let me leave a bit early), our neighbor (who helped with the boys while Sarah was indisposed), and my children (who came in bouncing on the bed to wake me up). Solar eclipses are more likely to take place than me getting a nap on a weekday in the afternoon when I'm not sick! But I am going to try to make arrangements so that this can occur for both Sarah and I more often.
Harry Truman took a 30 minute nap everyday. If the President who served at the end of WW2 and the beginning of the Cold War found time for a nap I may be able to as well!
Getting a nap in my family is a team effort. To make it happen I needed help from Sarah (who kept the kids out of the house at the park), my boss (who let me leave a bit early), our neighbor (who helped with the boys while Sarah was indisposed), and my children (who came in bouncing on the bed to wake me up). Solar eclipses are more likely to take place than me getting a nap on a weekday in the afternoon when I'm not sick! But I am going to try to make arrangements so that this can occur for both Sarah and I more often.
Harry Truman took a 30 minute nap everyday. If the President who served at the end of WW2 and the beginning of the Cold War found time for a nap I may be able to as well!
Monday, November 15, 2010
Fear, or even worse...reality.
Fear is an enemy of rest. When we are afraid we cannot shut-down our hearts and minds; we can't tune-out the source of our fear. In fact, I find that when something terrible is on my mind I can shut-it-out right up to the point of almost falling asleep, and then the thoughts spring back upon me and cause my heart to race again! Like a flash the frontal lobe of my brain is fully engaged and I continue to toss and turn.
Children face these fears before bed; the monster in the closet and the robber on the roof are real to them...they know the thunder and lightening are out to get them. No matter how much we as parents try to comfort them, the best antidote is to bring them to our room and cuddle.
As adults our fears are more complicated and less imaginary. I fear losing my job and house...I know the children are going to get a rare and incurable illness. No matter how well I shield myself from these fears the only real comfort comes from prayer and the assurance of God that He will never leave me or forsake me.
Do I really find comfort there? Sometimes I do. More often than that, however, I find comfort in my own abilities and talents. I work harder, think harder, and become more controlling of my life circumstances. I don't let go of the fight because if I do my worst fears may come true.
Trying to avoid the terrible circumstances of life is an exercise in futility. Everyone must face and endure swirling circumstances they did not choose and cannot escape. Reality is darker and more difficult than our imaginary fears; life doesn't always come with seat-belts and a role bar. And when I am being thrown from the Cadillac of life-dreams onto the hard-ball pavement of reality the best cushion is to stay limber...relax, because being tense will only make it hurt worse.
A ton of my energy is spent on tragedy avoidance. I spend a lot of my time putting on "seat-belts" to protect myself from pain. Reality, and the Bible, both show me that this is in large part futile because pain is coming my way whether I am ready or not. The best safety I can find is in the character of a child who knows to run to his parents and cuddle; the best antidote to pain is to take my parents into the closet of my fears with a flashlight.
A child in my school had open-heart surgery last summer just after she turned 9 years old. The parents are from another country, work 4 jobs between them, live in a drafty trailer, have no money and are completely uninsured. Fortunately, the surgery went well! But three days later this little girl had a stroke that cost her the use of much of the left-side of her body. Its been 5 months and we have been walking through the tragic overflow of these circumstances with the family since the very beginning. During one visit to the home my boss asked the mother how she was holding up and through the interpreter the mother said, "Where we come from life is very difficult. We expect life to be challenging." Her daughter's pain, and the subsequent pain involved with the life of the family, did not derail her because she has a world-view that accepts pain as a true reality.
Children face these fears before bed; the monster in the closet and the robber on the roof are real to them...they know the thunder and lightening are out to get them. No matter how much we as parents try to comfort them, the best antidote is to bring them to our room and cuddle.
As adults our fears are more complicated and less imaginary. I fear losing my job and house...I know the children are going to get a rare and incurable illness. No matter how well I shield myself from these fears the only real comfort comes from prayer and the assurance of God that He will never leave me or forsake me.
Do I really find comfort there? Sometimes I do. More often than that, however, I find comfort in my own abilities and talents. I work harder, think harder, and become more controlling of my life circumstances. I don't let go of the fight because if I do my worst fears may come true.
Trying to avoid the terrible circumstances of life is an exercise in futility. Everyone must face and endure swirling circumstances they did not choose and cannot escape. Reality is darker and more difficult than our imaginary fears; life doesn't always come with seat-belts and a role bar. And when I am being thrown from the Cadillac of life-dreams onto the hard-ball pavement of reality the best cushion is to stay limber...relax, because being tense will only make it hurt worse.
A ton of my energy is spent on tragedy avoidance. I spend a lot of my time putting on "seat-belts" to protect myself from pain. Reality, and the Bible, both show me that this is in large part futile because pain is coming my way whether I am ready or not. The best safety I can find is in the character of a child who knows to run to his parents and cuddle; the best antidote to pain is to take my parents into the closet of my fears with a flashlight.
A child in my school had open-heart surgery last summer just after she turned 9 years old. The parents are from another country, work 4 jobs between them, live in a drafty trailer, have no money and are completely uninsured. Fortunately, the surgery went well! But three days later this little girl had a stroke that cost her the use of much of the left-side of her body. Its been 5 months and we have been walking through the tragic overflow of these circumstances with the family since the very beginning. During one visit to the home my boss asked the mother how she was holding up and through the interpreter the mother said, "Where we come from life is very difficult. We expect life to be challenging." Her daughter's pain, and the subsequent pain involved with the life of the family, did not derail her because she has a world-view that accepts pain as a true reality.
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Sabbath Rest...
The original Sabbath was Saturday. There are still a ton of people who celebrate on Saturday, but most of the folks I know think of Sunday as the Sabbath. I think it has to do with Adam and Eve's first living day being the day of God's rest after creation...their first day was full of enjoying all God had done the previous 6 days. True to form, God wants us to begin with rest and worship rather than end with it. Not only is the Sabbath supposed to occupy 1/7th of our life, it is supposed to occupy the first 1/7th of our life.
There are those two words! There is the phrase that makes every agnostic nerve boil. There are the words that jump out and grab my "rest", dragging it to the ground and kicking it until its loins are black and blue and every rib broken. There are the words that bring the car of "rest" crashing against a tree...that catapult "true rest" off the road of peace over the cliff of duty crashing it on the rocks of joyless obligation. The phrase slipped in there almost unconsciously but unavoidably...the phrase, if you missed it, is "supposed to."
Anything like "supposed to," "ought to," or "should" conjures feelings in me of obligation, indebtedness, work, accountability, and requirement. My breaks in life are "supposed to" be breaks from all of the "supposed tos" in life! Additionally, religions are full of "supposed tos" that lay guilt on my conscious and create neurotic fears.
I just re-watched "Chariots of Fire" which, amongst other things, highlights Eric Liddel's plight when he learned that the first heat of his 100 yard dash in the 1924 Olympics fell on a Sunday. His conviction about the Sabbath wouldn't allow him to run on Sunday so he withdrew from the race and ran the 400 yard dash a few days later. The story is gripping and Eric heroically triumphs in the face of opposition. Stonewall Jackson was a Sabbath keeper, too. When the battles fell on Sunday he would give the brigade the next day off to rest. He was arguably the most dynamic leader of the Civil War.
Today is Sunday and, in my culture, a day of rest. Even in Army basic training, where every day was exactly the same horrible experience, Sunday's seemed different. Sunday's were more peaceful...or is hopeful the right word for it?
I'm not a strict Sabbath keeper, but I do see that God's obligation to observe a Sabbath is wise and purposeful. Its similar to requiring Abigail to take a nap even though she doesn't want to...she needs it but as a two year old she doesn't want to miss out on all the other fun going on. If she doesn't get a nap, however, life is pretty miserable for her (and everyone else around her). She won't make the choice to rest when she needs it so I make the choice for her because that is what is best in the big picture.
Keeping a Sabbath is a deliberate choice. I have to choose to rest rather than rush; choose to turn-off the water flow of life rather than leaving it on. It is also a matter of trust...trust in God that life will not fall apart when I spend a day resting.
I should finish by saying that the Sabbath is intended not just to rest, but to rest with God. I've heard it said that God is most glorified when we are most satisfied with Him alone. Adam and Eve were not just in the Garden of Eden resting, they were in the Garden of Eden resting with God...he was present with them in the Garden. A Sabbath without worship is like a garden without plants. God's intent in the Sabbath, I believe, is to reconnect us to Him, His Church, and our truest passion. A Sabbath should leave us energized and focused, with a clearer mind and purpose so that we are ready to embrace the bedlam of the other 6 days of the week.
When Abigail is resistant to rest I find myself trying to Lull her to sleep in my arms. Today I'm going to let God Lull me to rest in his arms.
There are those two words! There is the phrase that makes every agnostic nerve boil. There are the words that jump out and grab my "rest", dragging it to the ground and kicking it until its loins are black and blue and every rib broken. There are the words that bring the car of "rest" crashing against a tree...that catapult "true rest" off the road of peace over the cliff of duty crashing it on the rocks of joyless obligation. The phrase slipped in there almost unconsciously but unavoidably...the phrase, if you missed it, is "supposed to."
Anything like "supposed to," "ought to," or "should" conjures feelings in me of obligation, indebtedness, work, accountability, and requirement. My breaks in life are "supposed to" be breaks from all of the "supposed tos" in life! Additionally, religions are full of "supposed tos" that lay guilt on my conscious and create neurotic fears.
I just re-watched "Chariots of Fire" which, amongst other things, highlights Eric Liddel's plight when he learned that the first heat of his 100 yard dash in the 1924 Olympics fell on a Sunday. His conviction about the Sabbath wouldn't allow him to run on Sunday so he withdrew from the race and ran the 400 yard dash a few days later. The story is gripping and Eric heroically triumphs in the face of opposition. Stonewall Jackson was a Sabbath keeper, too. When the battles fell on Sunday he would give the brigade the next day off to rest. He was arguably the most dynamic leader of the Civil War.
Today is Sunday and, in my culture, a day of rest. Even in Army basic training, where every day was exactly the same horrible experience, Sunday's seemed different. Sunday's were more peaceful...or is hopeful the right word for it?
I'm not a strict Sabbath keeper, but I do see that God's obligation to observe a Sabbath is wise and purposeful. Its similar to requiring Abigail to take a nap even though she doesn't want to...she needs it but as a two year old she doesn't want to miss out on all the other fun going on. If she doesn't get a nap, however, life is pretty miserable for her (and everyone else around her). She won't make the choice to rest when she needs it so I make the choice for her because that is what is best in the big picture.
Keeping a Sabbath is a deliberate choice. I have to choose to rest rather than rush; choose to turn-off the water flow of life rather than leaving it on. It is also a matter of trust...trust in God that life will not fall apart when I spend a day resting.
I should finish by saying that the Sabbath is intended not just to rest, but to rest with God. I've heard it said that God is most glorified when we are most satisfied with Him alone. Adam and Eve were not just in the Garden of Eden resting, they were in the Garden of Eden resting with God...he was present with them in the Garden. A Sabbath without worship is like a garden without plants. God's intent in the Sabbath, I believe, is to reconnect us to Him, His Church, and our truest passion. A Sabbath should leave us energized and focused, with a clearer mind and purpose so that we are ready to embrace the bedlam of the other 6 days of the week.
When Abigail is resistant to rest I find myself trying to Lull her to sleep in my arms. Today I'm going to let God Lull me to rest in his arms.
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