Fear is an enemy of rest. When we are afraid we cannot shut-down our hearts and minds; we can't tune-out the source of our fear. In fact, I find that when something terrible is on my mind I can shut-it-out right up to the point of almost falling asleep, and then the thoughts spring back upon me and cause my heart to race again! Like a flash the frontal lobe of my brain is fully engaged and I continue to toss and turn.
Children face these fears before bed; the monster in the closet and the robber on the roof are real to them...they know the thunder and lightening are out to get them. No matter how much we as parents try to comfort them, the best antidote is to bring them to our room and cuddle.
As adults our fears are more complicated and less imaginary. I fear losing my job and house...I know the children are going to get a rare and incurable illness. No matter how well I shield myself from these fears the only real comfort comes from prayer and the assurance of God that He will never leave me or forsake me.
Do I really find comfort there? Sometimes I do. More often than that, however, I find comfort in my own abilities and talents. I work harder, think harder, and become more controlling of my life circumstances. I don't let go of the fight because if I do my worst fears may come true.
Trying to avoid the terrible circumstances of life is an exercise in futility. Everyone must face and endure swirling circumstances they did not choose and cannot escape. Reality is darker and more difficult than our imaginary fears; life doesn't always come with seat-belts and a role bar. And when I am being thrown from the Cadillac of life-dreams onto the hard-ball pavement of reality the best cushion is to stay limber...relax, because being tense will only make it hurt worse.
A ton of my energy is spent on tragedy avoidance. I spend a lot of my time putting on "seat-belts" to protect myself from pain. Reality, and the Bible, both show me that this is in large part futile because pain is coming my way whether I am ready or not. The best safety I can find is in the character of a child who knows to run to his parents and cuddle; the best antidote to pain is to take my parents into the closet of my fears with a flashlight.
A child in my school had open-heart surgery last summer just after she turned 9 years old. The parents are from another country, work 4 jobs between them, live in a drafty trailer, have no money and are completely uninsured. Fortunately, the surgery went well! But three days later this little girl had a stroke that cost her the use of much of the left-side of her body. Its been 5 months and we have been walking through the tragic overflow of these circumstances with the family since the very beginning. During one visit to the home my boss asked the mother how she was holding up and through the interpreter the mother said, "Where we come from life is very difficult. We expect life to be challenging." Her daughter's pain, and the subsequent pain involved with the life of the family, did not derail her because she has a world-view that accepts pain as a true reality.
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