In one of Mel Brooks' films a arrogant and out of touch French King is famous for audaciously stating, "Ah, its good to be king!" The audacity is evident because in saying this he is showing everyone around that he is a big jerk with no idea how to truly lead anything, let alone a country. I think the film is The History of the World, but I'm not sure.
When times are tough and I feel like I'd like a dose of "control everything" I need to remember that I am not, essentially, able to force things to go my way. Other people, over whom I have no control, were involved with creating my challenges and other people, over whom I have no control, will be involved with fixing them (if they can be fixed, that is).
Recognizing that I am not sovereign is a step towards finding rest. If I have to be the solution to every problem, or the hero of every story, I will strive, connive, control and usurp all day long to "make it happen." Last I checked, striving, conniving, controlling and usurping are not the traits of a restful person.
The person who can find rest is the one who can rest in spite of the poor circumstances and "out-of-controlledness."
Monday, January 31, 2011
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Bright Lights, Big City...
I've lived in the country and I've lived in the city. I've lived in some of the smallest, most remote towns in the United States and I've lived in some of the largest, most important cities.
I remember riding with my parents through the desert at night. We'd be able to see the lights from the upcoming towns looming on the horizon and, no matter how tiny the place really was, the lights made it look grand and promising! In the desert you can see the towns coming from miles and miles away.
I remember riding with my parents up I-10 from San Diego to visit my uncle in LA. On those nights we would drive for 3 straight hours at 65 mph and never have a moment when there were not vast numbers of streetlights or house lights surrounding the road in every direction. The population was dense and the lights made me feel like I was a part of something big! In the sprawling cities lights are everywhere.
Now I'm sitting in my living room with a fire in the fireplace and the oil lamps burning. My wife is asleep next to me on the couch, the children are out-cold, and the dog is settling in. Its bitter cold outside and I am thankful not to be on the road going anywhere tonight!
I remember riding with my parents through the desert at night. We'd be able to see the lights from the upcoming towns looming on the horizon and, no matter how tiny the place really was, the lights made it look grand and promising! In the desert you can see the towns coming from miles and miles away.
I remember riding with my parents up I-10 from San Diego to visit my uncle in LA. On those nights we would drive for 3 straight hours at 65 mph and never have a moment when there were not vast numbers of streetlights or house lights surrounding the road in every direction. The population was dense and the lights made me feel like I was a part of something big! In the sprawling cities lights are everywhere.
Now I'm sitting in my living room with a fire in the fireplace and the oil lamps burning. My wife is asleep next to me on the couch, the children are out-cold, and the dog is settling in. Its bitter cold outside and I am thankful not to be on the road going anywhere tonight!
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Put it into practice...
Over the past year I've reflected on how "rest" is as much a frame of mind as it is a physical activity. I've learned that the mind, body, soul and spirit must work together to find quietness and stillness. Little things like a regular bedtime, good/clean/clear friendships, stories & music, and working hard at a job I love, am good at, and find purpose in are all vital to make it through the "long haul" in peace. I've also learned that sacrificing many things that I like, even some that I really-really like, is necessary at times. Now it is time to put these things into practice in 2011!
Three years ago I "resoluted" to get to know myself better and find comfort in my own skin. Two years ago my resolution was to live a life of joy. Following those two up with a life of rest was the perfect order for me.
This year my goal is to adopt a more giving spirit...a crazy, "you should know better than to give that away" spirit. A "damn Doug, we can't afford to give that away" spirit. A "we really need to make a big sacrifice in our comfort level because its time to give deeply" spirit.
At dinner the other night I WAY overtipped because my beautiful bride reminded me of the vow I've made...it was awesome and freeing. I've heard it said that we can't outgive God...this year I'm going to try!
May God bless you all...and please don't use my vow as an opportunity to "gold dig"!
Three years ago I "resoluted" to get to know myself better and find comfort in my own skin. Two years ago my resolution was to live a life of joy. Following those two up with a life of rest was the perfect order for me.
This year my goal is to adopt a more giving spirit...a crazy, "you should know better than to give that away" spirit. A "damn Doug, we can't afford to give that away" spirit. A "we really need to make a big sacrifice in our comfort level because its time to give deeply" spirit.
At dinner the other night I WAY overtipped because my beautiful bride reminded me of the vow I've made...it was awesome and freeing. I've heard it said that we can't outgive God...this year I'm going to try!
May God bless you all...and please don't use my vow as an opportunity to "gold dig"!
Friday, December 31, 2010
Oh no, the year is over!
Getting more rest was my New Year's Resolution for 2010 and today the year is over! Now I'm afraid that I'll suddenly become a neurotic work-a-holic with dark bags under my eyes...I pressed on to keep my resolution for an entire year and now its back to the old habits!
Just kidding.
Learning to live restfully is more of a "New Decade Resolution" than a New Year's Resolution. Maybe in 10 years I'll be ready to move forward, but not quite yet. Its like learning a foreign language...the first 12 years are the hardest!
One take away I've seen is that in order to rest more I have to make sacrifices. At the beginning of this year I was trying to cram too much in; I had to learn to say "no" to many things. This has been one of the most difficult things to deal with!
Second, I see that without God it would be impossible for me to truly find rest. There are so many things outside of my control that at any moment could come crashing in! Knowing God loves me and, even in the worst of these things, will never leave me creates in me a deep peace. The Psalms call it resting under the shadow of his wing...like a baby bird with its mother.
Finally, I've become convinced that getting adequate rest does not come naturally to me. I fight it like a little child before bedtime! I want to work...I hate being bored...there is so much to do that is good, fun, and necessary! I've seen that for my work to be effective, and for any good, fun or necessary things to take place with joyfulness of spirit, I must be well rested.
I'm not sure what 2011's resolutions will be...I have some ideas about ethics, budgeting, giving and music, but nothing has formed in my mind as worthy and/or doable for the year yet. I'll keep you posted!
Just kidding.
Learning to live restfully is more of a "New Decade Resolution" than a New Year's Resolution. Maybe in 10 years I'll be ready to move forward, but not quite yet. Its like learning a foreign language...the first 12 years are the hardest!
One take away I've seen is that in order to rest more I have to make sacrifices. At the beginning of this year I was trying to cram too much in; I had to learn to say "no" to many things. This has been one of the most difficult things to deal with!
Second, I see that without God it would be impossible for me to truly find rest. There are so many things outside of my control that at any moment could come crashing in! Knowing God loves me and, even in the worst of these things, will never leave me creates in me a deep peace. The Psalms call it resting under the shadow of his wing...like a baby bird with its mother.
Finally, I've become convinced that getting adequate rest does not come naturally to me. I fight it like a little child before bedtime! I want to work...I hate being bored...there is so much to do that is good, fun, and necessary! I've seen that for my work to be effective, and for any good, fun or necessary things to take place with joyfulness of spirit, I must be well rested.
I'm not sure what 2011's resolutions will be...I have some ideas about ethics, budgeting, giving and music, but nothing has formed in my mind as worthy and/or doable for the year yet. I'll keep you posted!
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Stories & Boredom...
One of my favorite songs growing up was "The Gambler" by Kenny Rogers. It starts like this:
"On warm summer's evening on a train bound for nowhere I met up with the Gambler...we were both too tired to speak. So we took turns at staring out the window at the darkness until the boredom overtook us and we began to speak."
I love that line...the entire thing grabs me and makes me want to hear the rest of the story! This leads me to my next thoughts on "rest."
First, stories are a great way to "escape" for a while. I just finished the last Harry Potter book...it was a 6 month, 3000 page visit into the world of muggles, horcrux's, flying cars and friendships. The books, while I read them, ruined my sleep patterns for weeks on end; but the story was gripping and I found myself feeling well rested for reading them.
Similarly, what is it we do before bedtime with children all around the world? We read them a story! And, if you think about it, they go to bed and have dreams that are...stories (of a sort). I'm going to embrace stories as a means to rest better.
Second, boredom is something that can completely "overtake" us. Boredom is painful for those not used to it...after basic training I had nightmares about standing in line for hours on end that were so severe I would wake up shaking in the middle of the night! I think that the fear of boredom keeps me from settling down into a lifestyle of rest. To avoid being bored I create unnecessary stress that complicates my life and exasperates my relationships.
Being bored is not a bad thing. I'm certain that Magellan and his crew were bored at some point while circling the globe in a sailboat; Isaac Newton was very likely bored for hours on end while putting together his theory of the Laws of Motion...he was sitting under an apple tree doing what? Resting.
I hope this blog entry has not bored you. I tried to make it interesting by adding a story or two! May you have a boring, story-filled day!
"On warm summer's evening on a train bound for nowhere I met up with the Gambler...we were both too tired to speak. So we took turns at staring out the window at the darkness until the boredom overtook us and we began to speak."
I love that line...the entire thing grabs me and makes me want to hear the rest of the story! This leads me to my next thoughts on "rest."
First, stories are a great way to "escape" for a while. I just finished the last Harry Potter book...it was a 6 month, 3000 page visit into the world of muggles, horcrux's, flying cars and friendships. The books, while I read them, ruined my sleep patterns for weeks on end; but the story was gripping and I found myself feeling well rested for reading them.
Similarly, what is it we do before bedtime with children all around the world? We read them a story! And, if you think about it, they go to bed and have dreams that are...stories (of a sort). I'm going to embrace stories as a means to rest better.
Second, boredom is something that can completely "overtake" us. Boredom is painful for those not used to it...after basic training I had nightmares about standing in line for hours on end that were so severe I would wake up shaking in the middle of the night! I think that the fear of boredom keeps me from settling down into a lifestyle of rest. To avoid being bored I create unnecessary stress that complicates my life and exasperates my relationships.
Being bored is not a bad thing. I'm certain that Magellan and his crew were bored at some point while circling the globe in a sailboat; Isaac Newton was very likely bored for hours on end while putting together his theory of the Laws of Motion...he was sitting under an apple tree doing what? Resting.
I hope this blog entry has not bored you. I tried to make it interesting by adding a story or two! May you have a boring, story-filled day!
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Jacuzzi and a fire...
I have never posted twice in one day, but today is a special occasion. I experienced two awesomely restful things: a Jacuzzi and a fire in the fireplace. No, not at the same time unfortunately.
After my workout at the gym I spent 15 minutes soaking in the hot-tub alone...my mind wandered to blissful places as the muscles in my back, shoulders, and neck were pummeled by jets of steamy water.
The gas-logs were lit today for the first time this winter. Gas logs require so little effort, and the fire is always perfect and warm. Thank God for gas logs!
I'm going to pass-out in front of the fire...its wonderful!
After my workout at the gym I spent 15 minutes soaking in the hot-tub alone...my mind wandered to blissful places as the muscles in my back, shoulders, and neck were pummeled by jets of steamy water.
The gas-logs were lit today for the first time this winter. Gas logs require so little effort, and the fire is always perfect and warm. Thank God for gas logs!
I'm going to pass-out in front of the fire...its wonderful!
Crash and Burn
What happens when an airplane runs out of fuel in mid-air?
Crash and Burn.
What happens when a hot-air balloon runs out of hot air while floating above a city?
Crash and Burn.
What happens when a 37 year old father of 4 pushes it to the limits right before the holidays?
Crash and Burn.
And that is exactly what happened to me this past Friday on Christmas Eve.
We were in Cincinnati after a whirlwind month of parties, family gatherings, shopping, gift-wrapping, traveling, and sight-seeing. Additionally, work in a school is especially intense just before the holidays-just ask anyone who has ever worked with sugar-filled, Santa craving kids in December! On the way to the mall to get photos of the kids with their cousins I leaned over to Sarah, who was driving, and told her to pull over right away...
The kids got a kick out of watching me claim the corner of the road near the CVS with what used to be the contents of my stomach. But for me I was getting kicked in a slightly different way. I was wiped-out!
Two Christmases ago I crashed and burned on Christmas Day. We were home in Charlottesville and I spent all day in bed with a massive headache and fever.
I remember that the Christmas of 2005 was pretty rough. That was the Christmas during grad school when I was taking a full-load of classes, involved with an urban ministry, working 5 jobs, and trying to help Sarah with the soon to be 3 children (she was 7 months pregnant with Oak).
In my mind I have a Norman Rockwell like picture of what the Christmas/New Year's Holiday should be like, but I have not seen that picture come to life in reality yet. My 21st century picture is less austere...its more intense and energized (which I think is how I like it)! I just need to remember that sleep is important and there is an end to how much intensity my body can handle.
Crash and Burn.
What happens when a hot-air balloon runs out of hot air while floating above a city?
Crash and Burn.
What happens when a 37 year old father of 4 pushes it to the limits right before the holidays?
Crash and Burn.
And that is exactly what happened to me this past Friday on Christmas Eve.
We were in Cincinnati after a whirlwind month of parties, family gatherings, shopping, gift-wrapping, traveling, and sight-seeing. Additionally, work in a school is especially intense just before the holidays-just ask anyone who has ever worked with sugar-filled, Santa craving kids in December! On the way to the mall to get photos of the kids with their cousins I leaned over to Sarah, who was driving, and told her to pull over right away...
The kids got a kick out of watching me claim the corner of the road near the CVS with what used to be the contents of my stomach. But for me I was getting kicked in a slightly different way. I was wiped-out!
Two Christmases ago I crashed and burned on Christmas Day. We were home in Charlottesville and I spent all day in bed with a massive headache and fever.
I remember that the Christmas of 2005 was pretty rough. That was the Christmas during grad school when I was taking a full-load of classes, involved with an urban ministry, working 5 jobs, and trying to help Sarah with the soon to be 3 children (she was 7 months pregnant with Oak).
In my mind I have a Norman Rockwell like picture of what the Christmas/New Year's Holiday should be like, but I have not seen that picture come to life in reality yet. My 21st century picture is less austere...its more intense and energized (which I think is how I like it)! I just need to remember that sleep is important and there is an end to how much intensity my body can handle.
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